dancing

bird and i were standing at mom's grave,
on the granite slab, 
amidst the puddles of rain,
dirt, and grass.
grass that has begun to grow on the broken brown
soil. 
tender little green shoots stretching their way to cover 
the brokenness. 

and in some ways i wanted to dance.
just do a little soft shoe shuffle on that granite slab.
and then finish off with a fast toe-tapping rhythm. 
why?
because....
i have hope.

"my hope is built on nothing less
than Jesus blood and righteousness,
i dare not trust the sweetest frame
but wholly lean on Jesus name.
ON CHRIST THE SOLID ROCK I STAND
all other ground is sinking sand. 
all other ground is sinking sand."
 
and the reward..

"when He shall come with trumpet sound
oh may i then in Him be found.
dressed in His righteousness alone,
faultless to stand before the throne.
ON CHRIST THE SOLID ROCK I STAND
all other ground is sinking sand.
all other ground is sinking sand. "


i have hope
yes, my heart misses my mom.
yes, most likely i will shed tears of loss this weekend.
i don't anticipate sunday being tear-free.
but
i have hope.
i know for certain
because of that cross
because of that broken body
BECAUSE OF THAT RESURRECTION
i will see mom again.


my heart is slowly growing new sprouts of peace,
just like the grass that covers the grave where we
put mom's shell.
she is not there.
she is rejoicing in heaven with Jesus and many others.


that gives me reason to dance.
i can visualize bird, me, others, dancing in joy. 
and mom wouldn't mind one bit if we were dancing 
on her grave.
honest.