amazing.

it started out easy enough,
my day that is.
i even got to wear a holiday t-shirt and earrings.
i was feeling like myself.

hubby and i had a lovely breakfast after dropping 
off a car for repairs. 
we were filling the grocery cart, 
planning some meals.

cell phone rings.
it's my sister.
'where are u?' she asks?

"where do i need to be?" i reply. 

" mom is giving up."

okaaay.... u hear this in the grocery aisle
and I think. mom is dying. right then.

the clarification is mom and hospice have talked,
and it's time to make a decision.
24 hr care, or nursing home. 

we are to meet at the farm.

we do.

hospice is there when i get there.
after a bit of discussion we decide it's nursing home time.

phone calls, trips to town to get the necessary papers,
the urgency stressed to the nursing home..
" we need her in TODAY." 

more phone calls, papers signed, bags packed,
and by 4:30 the care home has arrived to transport momma.
i ride in the van w/momma and the ladies.
sister brings daddy in the car.

atmosphere is vastly different in each vehicle.
momma and i chat just like it was a normal day.
sister and daddy weep most of the ten miles in.
daddy says " i had her on the farm for 61 years." 
or " i wish we had rain this  summer so she 
could have had her pretty flowers." 


we are greeted at the care home by our hospice nurse.
i am so touched by her loving spirit, tears threaten to
gush down my face. 
breath deep, release, keep going.


the care home staff is amazing.
efficient, and quickly have her
using the lifts, ready for bed.
momma is happy. 
she loved the lift.
the air mattress arranged by hospice is great,
you can see visible differences in her countenance.


she had asked on saturday to go to the care home.
the men folk in the family encouraged her to hang in there
a little longer, try to get stronger, etc.
bravely she tried. 
but it was time and daddy told the nurse
" whatever she, ( momma) wants."


which brings us back to the care home.


let me tell you something amazing.
you would have thought the queen herself had arrived.
staff members were stopping in,
greeting momma like seeing a long lost friend.

and they were.
momma had served on the care home board for 9 years.
my grammie lived there for 16 years. 
we know this place, 
these people.
they were happy to see her again.
happy to be able to help us take care of her.


wow right?
God is good.


Plus,other residents, who are friends from long ago popped in.
some relatives who live there stopped by. 


my heart felt lighter.


i over heard a conversation between my parents...
dad, " how are you?"
mom, " i'm fine. i feel safe."
dad., "you're not afraid of falling now?"
mom, " no"


and daddy felt better.
it's was plain to see momma was where she wants to be.
my brother could see it too. 


i marveled at this woman.
she was back to 'herself.'


at the farm all day she was very quiet.
having some pain due to headache.
and so ready to die.


at the care home, after inquiring about a bible study,
discovering there wasn't one, 
she said," well maybe i'll start one." 


THAT is my momma. 
chin up, carry on valiantly.
you've told me she is special.
you betcha...and once again she's showing us how. 


my little queen momma is amazing.