God heard you...

you prayed for me didn't ya?
yes, i felt it. 
all day on tuesday, i felt it.
thankyou.
blessings on your loving and praying hearts.

sister-bird called me fairly early.
momma had called her saying 
"take the tv back. i can't see it."
her distance vision has become blurry.
she's had increased eye watering for a few weeks,
but this is the first vision change she's mentioned. 
okay then. 
chalk another one up for the tumors.


happily, since she now 'rides' the full body lift
she has more energy. 
daddy set up solitaire for her
and she played it some before lunch.


last week she and her sister had played rummy.
they grew up in a card playing family
and mom's grandpa taught her to play rummy.
i used to be able to, but have forgotten how.
maybe momma can re-teach me.

i did get to see my favorite hospice nurse.
we are still having trouble w/the oxygenator
so she's requesting a complete new one.


let me tell you, these hospice people 
know their stuff.
i hadn't been chatting long w/the nurse 
in the hallway and tears were racing down my face.
i did the usual response and tried to make them behave.
HA!
stress, grief, tears,.... it all has a mind of its own.
before i knew it, had to give in to the sobs
begging to be released. 
i'm sure it's not the first time those halls 
have seen tears. 


later in the evening the hospice social worker called me.
she was willing to come see me last evening.
by then, i was back to 'normal'
(okay, those of u who know me well...
normal isn't probably the first descriptive word 
you'd use.)
: )
i had mentioned to the hospice nurse 
" i just want life to be normal again.'
she gently asked,..." what is normal?"


i paused, then admitted
" i guess i just want life easier again."
then i blurted out some of the stressors.


and you know what she said?
" you have a lot of losses in your life.
you are dealing w/a lot." 
tears again.


now, today,... i'm working on something that is tough.
i'm rather independent, stubborn,, etc.
and many of you are giving me grace in this
journey, these "sacred days."
the tender hospice people are giving me 
grace in this journey.
one person isn't so kind.
me. 
i'm working on that.

but let me tell you a true story of grace.

yesterday momma said to me,
"i asked dad last night if he thought
i was being a baby."

i waited, then asked
"what did he say?"


she waited then said,
"he said, you're my baby." 


grace, love, devotion, commitment.
how blessed. 

he was 21, she was 18.

August 20, 1950